Many things

Progress has been made in several areas of my life. Not in the "writing without starting with an incredibly dry sentence in the passive voice" area, but in many other areas.

Yesterday I called the organ builders with whom I am hoping to start an apprenticeship at some point. I have a PhD funding deadline coming up, and if there is no hope of me becoming an organ builder it would be better to find out sooner rather than later so that I can go for this funding.

We had a nice chat. She reckons that there will be a shortage of organ tuners in the next few years, so I would have a good chance of getting a job as a tuner, providing I am up to the task. They are not looking to expand, so there are unlikely to be any organ building jobs advertised, but she said that they would often be able to create a position if the right person came along.

As an organ builder's apprentice, I would be on the minimum wage. This means that I would be better off financially than when I did my MSc. That can only be a good thing! I was a little worried that it would be legal to pay apprentices less than the minimum wage, as they receive training. Given that I have to eat, not being paid would be too much of a barrier for me, and I would not be able to do that.

I have been advised to contact my local (only an hour's drive away) organ builder and see if I can get some tuning work experience. As organ builders only work during normal working hours, and I work during normal working hours, I am going to have to reduce my hours somehow to accommodate this. I would like to reduce my hours anyway, as I need a bit more variety in my days, and I need to get it before I explode rather than after the event. I am working on it. Last time (when I did my MSc), after an epic battle (and an unsuccessful job hunt), I got my wish, but my reasoning is more flimsy now - everything is still speculative.

It was wonderful when I only worked 3 1/2 days per week, though. Everything seemed easier, and the job was so much fun! It was harder fitting more into the time available, but I had more motivation to do it because I knew that I didn't have to go to work on Fridays. I also didn't notice very much when I had been a long time without a holiday, and holidays were a big treat. Granted, the MSc really did take it out of me (oh, those nightmare late-night essay/dissertation sessions, in which I was convinced that I would never ever get it done, and that I might as well give up because there was no way I would get the marks I wanted. The mark I needed to get for my dissertation was impossibly high for me, so this was quite a reasonable fear!), so it was not all joy and puppies, but I did get a lot more variety. I want variety, and I want it now!

I also have some non-news about this organ scholarship I am hoping to get. They have e-mailed me asking me to give them a call. We shall see where that leads. It would be wonderful to have an organ to practise on, and somebody who would be disappointed/annoyed if I were to fail to do enough practice, though. I think that my playing would improve a lot. Certainly next year's Chaplaincy Christmas carol service would be more relaxing. Except that I would probably come up with an excellent way to make life more complicated for myself by playing something I have no hope of playing, mess it up, and become known as the next organist to mess up, despite generally playing better than my previous performance, which was widely acclaimed (because they are not very musical there, apparently. It really wasn't great by any of the usual definitions).

So I am now feeling nervous, excited, and slightly concerned about my mental health. I am not convinced I should move so quickly from the pits of despair to being content (in an expectant way), hopeful and excited, and am hoping that these are not the symptoms of a crazy chemical imbalance which will have to be treated with drugs (as you can see, the paranoia remains). It does seem unlikely, though; surely it is the circumstances that have changed. I suppose that I have taken a step towards something I really want to do, established that it is not impossible that I would be able to do that closer to where I currently live (we would have to move between City Below and Other City), and heard something which is not yet negative about this organ scholarship. I am also confident that my hours will be reduced so that I only work four days per week, but that confidence is clearly because I am delusional, as it flies in the face of logic.

Oh yes, and I went climbing yesterday. Now my arms are a little stiff (and my legs a little tired), but I am very glad that I went. I am not going to fit into the trousers I am just about to throw away by sitting on my bum doing nothing! Also, I got to go to the supermarket and discover that my debit card has gone walkabouts - it is better to find that sort of thing out sooner rather than later. It is also good that I have two debit cards from which to choose, as otherwise buying my shopping would have been more difficult. I suspect that I have just mislaid it (it will probably be on my office floor), but it has now been canceled. The numbers I had to call were obsolete, though - using area codes that no longer exist. Perhaps I should ask them for an updated keyring...

I think I may have got distracted somewhere along the way

I am feeling a bit better today. Thank goodness for that. It is so very frustrating being so annoyed over so little. It is also very tiring and a waste of my life. Happiness is much more satisfactory, and I shall try to do this instead. Except that one cannot do happiness, as far as I know. But you know what I mean.

Anyway, posts complaining are often very boring indeed, especially if the writer can't even be bothered to format them correctly. I shall therefore talk of joyful things.

I should have some fuchsia alpaca wool arriving any day now. Also some knitting needles in the wrong size (1.25mm too big).* How exciting! In a totally novel and unpredictable move, I shall then knit myself a scarf. It will be the wrong shape, I expect, but I think that it might be a good idea to let go of the perfection thing until my second knitting project.

I think I milked that subject for all it was worth today.**** Now to milk another.

I am surrounded by boxes at the moment. Many of them now contain lots of things, including HWSNBN's CD collection. This is a big collection. If this move has done nothing else, it has given him an opportunity to sort this out and retrieve a couple of his CDs from my CD rack. One of them (my favourite one) was just an empty case.***** It turned out that this is because he had put the CD in his car CD case, for traveling - its missing-ness was not my fault at all! In fact, it was not actually missing at all, and I did not get into trouble! Yay for CDs!

I also started to sort out my shoes. I have selected about eight pairs I am happy to get rid of (well, about five pairs I am happy to get rid of, and three pairs I want to keep (including my favourite shoes in the world ever (2002-2007, RIP), which have flowers on the soles so that they make patterns when I walk on the sand), but have decided that it just isn't sensible), and kept two boxes of them. No, I am not counting. I might post a photo when they are installed, though. Not of the shoes specifically, more of the new house. I imagine that I will be very proud of my work when we are installed, and will want to show it off. I do sound a little weird, though, wanting to post photos of shoes. There are only two pairs I really consider to be photo-worthy (plus my favourite pair ever); my new strappy ankle shoes and my black leather knee-high boots which don't really fit me but which are too new, lovely and gorgeous to get rid of. Ever. They will go really well with my corset, should I have occasion to wear such an outfit.

Anyway, I have one box of shoes packed (I can't go anywhere posh until after we move now), and a few big ones (boots) standing by until I open another box for my shoes. I think that I will start to sort out my clothes on Saturday afternoon, after the landlord has visited. Tomorrow evening, HWSNBN will move most/all of the boxes to his mum's garage; when I return from climbing I can give the bathroom a preliminary good clean (in case the landlord wants to see it), and HWSNBN will hopefully do something with the kitchen.

Of course, we still have to go to The Field and take all of the flagstones which have been hanging around to the vegetable patch (I want to complete the paths this year) on Saturday. While we are there, we really ought to take some trees for planting, as I am getting little tired of carting trees around. Also, I think that they would probably like their freedom. I would really like to see the purple hazel grow big and strong, and it is not going to do that in a little pot. Having said that, I think that I will keep the acers in pots, and will probably also have to keep the twisted ?willow? ?hazel? and the little dangly tree, which has catkins. Does that make it a willow? And the two hostas. Possibly a pot of mint (although I will probably liberate all of that, too - it is out-competing the nettles where it has been planted, and I know that I would rather have hills overrun with mint (which does not sting you and tastes good on its own) than nettles (which do, and which I haven't tasted). I am sure that I have lots of other random little plants which need moving, but I can't remember them just yet.

Another task I must complete is the plotting of the vegetable patch. I need to ascertain whether or not I have permission to bring some of my friends along to help with the growing/weeding (and possibly also the mowing - Rose is the adventurous sort, and would probably be up for that. I don't expect she has had a go on a ride-on mower before). If I do, we need to sketch out a plan for what will be grown in each bed soon, and get the peppers started. Ideally, they need to get going in February, so if I could get permission on Saturday I could speak to them on Sunday and arrange a date to meet up and discuss options.

Although there are certain things which must be done with the design of the plot (I am trying to get into a strict rotation pattern, so that each bed only has potatoes once every six years - there are 8 beds, two of which have semi-permanent and permanent dwellers, and which are subject to a different rotation pattern from the other beds. Lettuces went there last year), we can afford to be adventurous with the actual vegetables we grow. I need to make the order soon, though (although I will be eke-ing out the seeds I have left from previous years where possible, and I do already have a full complement of potatoes. But the artichokes need splitting ASAP - they were looking really tired last year. Bugger - I forgot to make a note of which ones were doing well, and which were not).

Also, Rose and Ele will be giving up plastic for Lent, which adds a bit of complication to getting compost for starting off seedlings. Hopefully the stuff I have already will do - that was bought last year, and so is exempt from their ruling. I hope. Otherwise, I am sure that they will be happy to extract their own topsoil from The Field.

Did I ramble? Sorry about that. I suddenly realised that I am not nearly busy enough at the moment. I hope that this vegetable patch helping thing works - we could get a really good crop (weather permitting) this year. Oh, and Ele and I will make wine. That will be fun, too. Not before we move, though. I packed my wine book, and will pack the equipment any day now.


*Yes, I know - the brief was to talk about something joyful and interesting.** I do not look likely to succeed at either. It should be less angry, though - is that any good?

**Well, the "interesting bit was implicit, insofar as I was suggesting that writing boring things was bad; people who do that are usually getting at the necessity to write interesting things, although they could just really be in to*** boring things.

***in to? into? Probably the latter. The former just looks weird.

****Don't worry - you will get to hear of it again.
Goodness me; this level of sarcasm is hard to bear sometimes, isn't it. If it were funny it could be more useful, but I am using the whole "let's try to make this slightly funny by pointing out that it isn't really very interesting (to put it politely) to the vast majority of people" gag a little bit too often. Should I accept that these things are not interesting and just stop using the gag, or should I jut think that those who do not find it fascinating don't have to read it, and stop trying to make it funny? Whichever way you look at it, I should be limited to using that inexpert device twice a month at most. Please don't count, though; you'll only disappoint me when you point out my mistake. Although I will be impressed that you noticed.

*****Actually, this was not the case. (sorry) It contained one of my learn Italian CDs. My learn Italian CD case, however, did not hold the corresponding CD of HWSNBN; effectively, the case was empty, only with a few hopeful moments when I thought I would be able to retrieve the lost item without getting into trouble.

Still moving. Will be moving for a while.

I continue to bimble along, achieving little. I have started to pack the contents of my house (five boxes down, more than I care to admit to go), and shall have to make a concerted effort in that direction this weekend. I told HWSNBN that I was prepared to take on a lot of the responsibility for this house move, so I shall have to become very proactive soon.

Last night I packed all gardening books of the appropriate size, most of Delia (her vegetarian collection is, alas, too big for my boxes) and my entire soup-making collection. And a few assorted cookbooks also of the appropriate size. I also moved three candles across to a different table, two matches back into their box, and the radio onto the floor. I can scarcely keep up with the pace of my packing myself - it must be very bewildering only to hear about it second-hand. I am sure you are amazed with the sheer quantity of book categories I can pack in just one single evening. Let me tell you, that is nothing. I can pack twice that, and propose to do so this evening. I know, I know; I really am setting difficult-to-achieve goals for myself, but one has to aim high or one will never achieve anything!

Actually, the most difficult goal I have set for myself is that of moving twice as many boxes from the office to the car as I did yesterday - I was at my limit with six boxes, one of which some girl took a fancy to. She requested it and I gave it to her with very bad grace indeed. I know - I can make a run at lunchtime. Tuesday's bags of shredded paper still take up most of the back of my car, though, and the hammocks (which I still haven't told HWSNBN about) are still in the boot of the car, plus I am giving a lift to my colleague this evening which means that a) I will not be getting rid of the shredded paper this evening; and b) I must not stack the passenger seat full of boxes. I could always lift up the back seats and stack the paper bags on top of each other, I suppose.

We also have to get rid of the bed settee temporarily. No need to pay attention to this section, though - I have a feeling I have said it already, and that I shall say it again a few times until the offending item is moved. Once that is gone I will have more space to sort out my clothes and *sob* get rid of some of them. As one of the objects of this house move is to make me get rid of excess stuff (as opposed to acquiring hammocks), I had better make a good job of it. Also, the washing needs to be washed and put away. As HWSNBN will be off work for a few days he might do this. Then again, he might not. I ought to put a wash on when I get home (I notice that he has put a selection of dirty clothes in the basket - it will not be hard), and put lots of clean clothes away.

I noticed that the knicker fairy had been to fill up the knicker drawer since yesterday morning. I didn't look in the sock drawer (wearing tights today. You don't think they would go in the sock drawer, do you? How absurd. They go in the bra, corset and nightwear drawer, of course!) but I suspect that she will have visited too - she works with the knicker fairy quite regularly. The t-shirt, shirt and skirt fairy, alas, does not exist (HWSNBN might beg to differ on this one, although he would lament the infrequency of her visits). The trouser fairy has only ever appeared to me once, but she did a good job in difficult circumstances. Her little fairy hands must be better at getting trousers into an already full drawer than mine are.

I am starting to feel a little sad about moving. Still afraid (although much less so), but the packing process just makes me feel bad. It's the emptying and removing myself from the place,I suppose. I could also be mis-attributing the sadness I feel because I have so much packing to do, to the fact that I am leaving this house. That doesn't sound entirely unlikely. Mind you, I am the sort of person who likes to be where she is already. Going anywhere always takes time because I rarely want to stop staying put. Even at work it can take me ages to leave, because I am settled there.

Ah well; I am sure that this will all be very good for me. If Efficient Abi manages to surface this evening, some actual progress may well be made...